We found out some news tonight and whenever I get emotional, instead of outwardly expressing it, my best outlet is to write about it.
One of our favorite couple friends are pregnant (not mentioning names because I'm not sure if they've told everyone yet). First of all, let me say that we are INSANELY excited for them! Brad and I love, love, love these friends and this is a couple that will be extraordinary parents!! We were hoping to get pregnant at the same time in order to have a co-ed, keg baby shower (hehehe....WE wouldn't be drinking the beer, of course!!).
Having said that, when you're struggling with infertility, it's difficult to hear about other couples getting pregnant. And don't get me started on Teen Mom! UGH - it's a trainwreck and I CAN'T.STOP.WATCHING. We'll have a family - we both know it. All in due time, right? It's just hard to remember that when you're in the midst of struggling with infertility/waiting to adopt.
So, hubs and I were feverishly cleaning the house tonight when we received this call. And by feverishly cleaning I mean shoving things in closests and in our bedroom so our out-of-town guests won't see it this weekend. :-) While we were tackling the guest bedroom we came across my wedding gown *sigh*. We keep meaning to have a "trash the dress" photo session, but since funds don't allow for that right now, I haven't tried my wedding gown since our wedding day. Who would - that's crazy right? Welllll......I was obviously feeling a little down, then a little nostalgic...so I tried it on. I mean, come on, EVERY girl gets nostalgic when she's sees her wedding gown, right? hehehe..FORTUNATELY, it still fit...a little better than even on our wedding day. INSTANT DAY BRIGHTENER!! YAY!
Thank goodness I have such a fantastic husband who doesn't mind that his wife is a mild lunatic!
I understand the emotions that go along with finding out that a friend is pregnant while you are struggling. Katie and I tried for four years to get pregnant until the first time. We lost that pregnancy and two more since. Every time, we have a friend or two that is pregnant and due right around the same time as our lost babies. It is difficult watching those children be born and grow up, and I have a feeling it always will be. I won't lie to you and tell you that it gets easier to handle your emotions as time passes, but I will say that you are not alone.
ReplyDeleteI understand how you feel! I had the same mixed emotions when Demaree told me she was pregnant. At that point Eric and I had been trying for almost 3 years and her and Brett weren't even thinking about it. It was really hard for me to watch her go through it knowing that! But I was so excited for them too.
ReplyDeleteUgh - I know the feeling! Praying for you both. Matt's right - it doesn't really get easier, BUT having that awesome husband makes hard times like these so much easier to bear. I'm blessed to have Matt in my life - for better or worse! :)
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